Hi gentle reader!
I have to apologize about my tardiness in getting a post up. I've been glum and slothly lately. My personal problems don't need airing here, but I think we all know how easy it is to get discouraged and down in the face of the problems of our lives. Money, sex relations, friendships that seem off, or being cooped up so long this winter. Cabin Fever can get anyone down!
And the world's affairs as brought us by the news... Sometimes I can't take all the killings, the foolish and cruel words pundits trumpet in the papers, the meanness and pettiness, and stubbornness, and the out and out dishonesty, manipulation, and twisting of fact into fantasy. It brings out both my sorrow at the sad state of the planet, my helplessness in the face of it all, and my worst nature as I retaliate in words, usually on facebook. (God help me be more understanding and kind...)
I want to call Mr. Santorum a stupid-head (well actually I want to use much meaner words) because the man has opinions and beliefs I abhor and reject. He's not the only one out there in the public square that I feel an urge to castigate.
I hate that feeling of meanness. The fact is I'm in no position to judge him since I'm not perfect, and I have my own sincere yet unpopular beliefs. They might even be wrong.
I fear the ends that Radical Right wing people want. I see visions of Nazi-like Internment Camps to "Pray the Gay Away" . Lynchings and Krystalnacht like mob attacks on Gay Friendly, Liberal, or Democrat related businesses. I read my histories of the Spanish Civil war, of the American Civil War, of Domestic unrest in Syria and Ancient Rome...
I see tyranny, the worst of Religiosity, a coming of Inquisitors and Torture, and the shredding of the Principles of great, powerful American ideals. You know, Equality of human value, freedom to worship anything or nothing, to pursue happiness, the concept that I have freedom to be me out to the distance of my elbows, my neighbors being my equals and worthy of respect for that alone.
that the purpose of Government is to provide for the public welfare and the common defense of that welfare...
I tremble when I consider how minor Education changes are allowing more home schooling, which though in some homes can be quite good, in most homes becomes a cover for either Political/Religious indoctrination or Out-and-out Child Abuse. A horror that there isn't an answer to.
I see Charter Schools concentrating the best and richest students, at the expense of public access through the conventional public schools that are losing the battle for funding, and threaten to leave the mass of average and under-privileged American children behind...creating a mob of undereducated and gullible adults easily manipulated in the future by the dark powers of wrong-headed Ideology and popularist Demagogues.
Ultimately I foresee Civil War. There is such a powerful fear among our populace. We have many over-armed people who misunderstand the functions of the Government, who have ideologies of fear, who wave an American Flag yet refute the Government's Laws. Who are riddled with hatred of race, of sex, of muslims, and Non-Christians, and even among Christians there are deep rifts.
An armed people who believe Revolution might change things, and worse, have been inculcated in a cult of Apocalypse. Who feel inside that things are wrong, and in their fear and helplessness and simple plain ignorance become easy to ignite into a fratricidal immolation...
I think of my Uncles in Georgia, my Brother in Big-Lake, even some friends, who like Sarah Palin are woefully ignorant of the basic functioning of the Economy, of our own Government, of Balances and Checks, and the historical rationale for separation of church from state. Who have convinced themselves of the rightness of crusade, a "
Deus vult" mentality that justifies social destruction.
I wish I could say "it won't ever happen here", or "we learned from the evil of second world war Germany", but the fact is History is replete with examples like Algeria, Sudan, China, of such soul-shredding civil destruction. Whirlwinds of hate unleashed. It's so easy. So very, very easy. All it takes is a bit of stepping beyond the bounds of civility, a bomb, a careless statement, a bit of excess fear, a demagogue to fire the ignorant, or the unhappy...
And so, inside I pray it's not happening here, but I know there is a swell below the ground of every Volcano... and I tremble for us all.
That is part of why I have been gloomy lately.
I've been feeling hopelessly stuck in limbo. With my Partner unable to work on my Electrolysis, my face being so sensitive to the razor, a smooth and passable face seems millions of hours (if ever) away. My SRS being so very far away as my savings have been depleted by things beyond my control... I need a pep.
So Fact and Reason being the best antidotes to worry and fear I looked up a few facts;
A Person's facial hair numbers around 30,000 individual hairs. It takes about 5 seconds to electrolyze it, plus about 40 seconds to maneuver the electro-probe into position. Roughly 45 seconds per hair. In ideal conditions it should take somewhere around 375 to 400 hours to kill all my facial hair. In theory of course. I had to add that up, because I'm a depressed girl today. It helps to see the number, and how small it really is. It isn't the thousands that seemed so hopeless!
It takes time. Just time and patience, and small regular steps to get there. And that's true in life.
I may not be able to intervene in world affairs, to stop an oncoming war, or an orgy of violence, but who's to say such must be our fate anyway? I can't KNOW the future, and I believe in hope. It takes only good people doing daily good works. Telling the truth, being honest and level headed. Educate and challenge others with actual fact, refute untruths when we see them, and more important, Be KIND, and Loving to someone, to everyone. Give them a break, walk a few feet in their shoes, and do the next right thing as best you see it. Then if the world goes to hell, at least you can have a nice day!
Brianne
