Monday, January 30, 2012

The "T-word".

Hi There!

OK, gotta make a post on this. I have become more than aware this last week of swirling controversy over use of the word "tranny". with the visibility of Transfolk growing thanks to the internet, there is more awareness of Transpeople in cis-gendered circles (ie. those who aren't transfolk, or "normal" if you will). That's good so far as it goes.
Problem is, we transpeople live in a world that is made for cis-gendered people. The majority rules in this case, and the majority of our fellow people see the world as a gender binary place. Male or Female. I'm not judging here, just reporting a fact.
Thing is, Tranfolk are a bunch of odd ducks. We sit on the shoulders of the bell curve in our building of self-identies. Having to struggle with our individual identities, we tend to develop a lot of insecurity, probably a bit more than our fair share.
Of course there are plenty of well-adjusted Transfolk out there. I like to think of myself as one, but I'm not without my fears. Being pre-op there's always a bit of concern that I'm gong to run into the odd fool who gives me crap when I go potty, or the cop that pulls me over for a traffic violation then proceeds to violate my civil rights. Problem is, I understand that these are semi-rational fears. The probabilities of that happening are along the lines of getting run over by a battleship. Possible, but not likely.
So, I harbor fears that people are just all kinds of ready to gang up on me and tear me apart like Pentheus at the Bacchanal. I know that it's not likely to happen, but the fact that it's a non-zero possibility does sit over my head sometimes. And I see that it sits over other heads too.
That's kinda the problem with discrimination, the fact that real victimization occurs generates the fear of victimization, and unchecked, the victim turns that fear back into reality, seeing discrimination where it doesn't exist. The reality of discrimination is real, don't get me wrong. Transpeople get hit with little tastes of it all too often, and I've lost one dear friend to it.
But I can't go around looking over my shoulder or being afraid of my own shadow. That isn't why I came out, but rather the reverse. I'm glad to be me, and I won't let the fear that someone else doesn't like it stop me. That's the road to self destruction.
Yeah, I want to be liked and loved and treated respectfully by EVERYBODY, and I'm a realist enough to know that it won't happen. I'm liberal enough to allow the jerks and the turds of the world have thier asinine opinions because it's thier right to do so. There are laws that protect me from most gross abuses, and even though I've been hurt with words (I find being called "it" most objectionable) I have on occasion been able to say; Hey, that's thier insecurities lashing out, it's not about me.
And that's the truth of the matter. Anyone who accosts me with words (or fists even) does so out of thier own dark shadowed soul. I am secure enough in who I am to know I'm not some kind of freakish alien. None of us are.
Back to "Tranny". Some people are convinced that tranny is a slur. I don't think it is and here's why; Tranny is a diminutive of transexual, the suffix -y, derived from the Old English -ge denotes an intensification of the word to which it's added. One shortens the four syllable word transexual into a two syllable version trann-y the -y indicating that no loss of the aspects that go into transexual has occured.
That's it. There isn't anything demeaning in "tranny" that isn't there in "transexual".
The only issue here is usage. Some people spin the word into a verbal attack, implying what? that somehow to be a transperson is to be "less-than"? Screw that. This is my word.
Call me an "it" if you want to insult me, because that's what you want to imply anyway, that I'm not a person, and not as good as you. But if you say it, know that I secretly am aware that YOU are the one who's got the problem. It's you who are uncomfortable, offended, SCARED of me. I'm not going to let you turn that table and victimize me. I'm going to dial 911, and I'm going to hold my head high. I'm a human being, and I'm a woman, and you don't have to like it, but you aren't going to change it.
Have a nice day!
Brianne

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